Short term pain, long term happiness

With my daughter turning three in August, I know we’ll soon have a conversation or two about honesty. 

It’s a complicated subject, so I expect this conversation to occur off and on over the next…say…75 years (I plan to live to 115).

Most people think honesty is about lying or not lying, and therefore not very complicated.  I disagree.  I think honesty is about facing the facts.  If you frame honesty in such a way, you can live a moral life, and achieve and sustain happiness (which is what I think morality is all about).

You can lie and be moral.  For example, if I’m served liver and Brussels sprout casserole I can tactifully lie by thanking the server.  I’m not denying the fact that I hate liver and Brussels sprouts, but the thanks is polite.  That white lie is not incompatible with honesty.

If the Nazis come to my door and ask where I’m hiding the Jews, I can’t say, “first door on the left,” and be moral.  Once again, the lie does not deny the facts, it simply acknowledges that I have no moral obligation to be truthful with monsters (actually, being truthful will definitely bring unhappiness).

It’s my stand that you have to be honest, to face the facts, in order to be happy.  But, happiness is not equal to instant gratification.  Sometimes, being honest with oneself or others is short term painful.

For example, think about making a mistake on the job and telling your boss.  Your boss is unlikely to be happy, but you have to face the the facts and let your boss know because she has the right to know.  If your boss is any good, she will reward that honesty over time even if she isn’t happy with the mistake.

In fact, I would go so far as to say that many (most?) moral things, like honesty, are short term painful in order to reach long term happiness.

I exercise 5 days a week.  I work out hard enough that it’s mildly painful.  But, the rewards pay for the effort.

I work hard to find investments.  I spent hours, day, months doing research on each investment idea.  This is rarely a fully pleasant experience.  And yet, I know it will work in the long run.  That’s why I do it.

Buying investments that will do better than average almost always includes short term pain.  The reason why it will do better than average is because something is wrong.  Most people will think you’re nuts for investing there–that’s why it’s cheap!

Over the long run, too, buying such short term pain provides long term happiness.

Do you think my three year old will understand why honesty or investing can bring short term pain and long term happiness?  No, me neither. 

But, over time she will, and then she’ll be long term happy, too.

Nothing in this blog should be considered investment, financial, tax, or legal advice. The opinions, estimates and projections contained herein are subject to change without notice. Information throughout this blog has been obtained from sources believed to be accurate and reliable, but such accuracy cannot be guaranteed.

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Short term pain, long term happiness

Think winning the lottery is the key to happiness?

Contrary to fact, many believe winning the lottery would bring them happiness.

Want an anecdotal example of why this isn’t the case? Read a tragic story here: http://abcnews.go.com/2020/story?id=3012631&page=1

Want further proof? A presentation by GMO highlighted that “2 out of 3 winners spend or lose ALL of their winnings within five years.” Also, “1 out of 3 winners declares bankruptcy!”

So, why do so many people still play the lottery? It’s the triumph of hope over reason, in my opinion. Many people want a short cut to happiness.

I believe the path to happiness is doing what you love for a living. Financial success is a result, not a cause.

To achieve happiness and success, you need to work hard, add value for others, be honest and have integrity. It’s simple to say, but hard to do. Most seem to know this deep down, but are too lazy to do it.

Nothing in this blog should be considered investment, financial, tax, or legal advice. The opinions, estimates and projections contained herein are subject to change without notice. Information throughout this blog has been obtained from sources believed to be accurate and reliable, but such accuracy cannot be guaranteed.

Failure = quitting

My father worked hard to convince me how important attitude is, but I didn’t do a very good job of listening. I’ve spent most of my life thinking attitude was a result, not a cause. But, now I know otherwise.

My dad is one of those really optimistic people. He expects good outcomes, and so they frequently happen. He’s one of the happiest people I know. He laughs easily, has strong relationships with family and friends, and has a good time doing even the mundane things.

When he had knee surgery last year, he was worried but also optimistic about the outcome. What happened? He’s taken to his new knee very well. This outcome is a result of his attitude, which led him to do the things he needed for the operation to be a success. He was a model patient and a model during physical therapy afterward. His outcome was assured because of his attitude.

You see, I’ve discovered that failure is not the result of things going poorly, it’s the result of quitting. No one can make you quit. You have to chose to quit. When things don’t work out the way you would like, it’s only feedback. You use this feedback to change your thinking and action, and that leads to success. As long as you keep trying, you can’t fail. As long as you keep taking that feedback and trying new approaches, you will eventually succeed.

It took me a long time to realize this, but now I see it clearly. Success happens because people go into things with the right attitude. The right attitude allows them to do the things necessary to succeed. If things don’t work out, they modify their thoughts and actions to get the outcomes they want. They don’t stop trying until they get the results they want. The only way to fail is to stop trying or to never try. The only person who fails is the one who quits.

Or, as more succinctly put by Napoleon Hill in Think and Grow Rich: ” A quitter never wins–and a winner never quits.”

Nothing in this blog should be considered investment, financial, tax, or legal advice. The opinions, estimates and projections contained herein are subject to change without notice. Information throughout this blog has been obtained from sources believed to be accurate and reliable, but such accuracy cannot be guaranteed.